Happy Friday,
I was in communication with a family member recently, and we were having a difference of opinion. I'm always amazed at how family feels entitled to just say and do anything that they want to you , and of course we're supposed to accept it. I didn't sign up for that part of the deal. With family we don't get to choose who we're related to, we find a way to accept the hand we are dealt.
Why is it so hard for family to accept the fact that children grow up to become adults with our own thoughts, opinions, dreams and struggles. Yes it's hard to digest that we grow up, especially when they see us from our childhood. I use to give them a pass to treat me as a child. At some point you have to stand and say enough is enough. Sisters argue with sisters, Brothers will fight brothers. I've taken for granted, the luxury of being an only child.
Exercising discernment is the only way to find harmony in a world of madness, unfortunately sometimes that madness in your world can be brought on by the people who are supposed to love you the most, your family. I say take time to evaluate what your comfort level is. Stand your ground when you feel that you're being pushed. Hopefully you can do it with love, and if that doesn't work, be prepared to take it there.....and if they still don't get it, it might just be time for you to create your OWN core family, which can consist of a mate and friends who make up your extended family.
What are you doing with your Life?
This one really hit home. I thought I was the only one.
ReplyDeleteAmen to this one.
ReplyDeleteTG-Jo
It is difficult with family no matter the situation. I recall when I first met my husband I was excited that his family was so big and they often gathered and had big fun. But as the years passed and the confusion that persisted in the masses my excitement dwindled. If he was an only child…might have been a blessing in disguise. I’m just saying…LOL (yes I’m using your words).
ReplyDeletePeace -
Hey Kev, last night, my foster daughter and I just had a converstaion regarding this very topic. I forwarded your blog to her. You're absolutely right, we can't choose our family but we can certainly choose our friends...and I choose you.
ReplyDeleteWow! You hit the nail on the head with that one! Politics and religion are off limits with family in my world! Whew!!!! Makes me shudder just thinking of that conversation! I hope I'm always in your core family. I love you my precious son! Don't ever forget that!
ReplyDeleteThank you for this. I just had a similar "family meeting" and concluded that obviously change was the only option.
ReplyDeleteTake care.
You're absolutely right, family feels entitled to say and do anything they damn well please. The moment you stand up for yourself, all of sudden you're the bad guy. Now I'm all about me, and the people who are in my life who love me for me.
ReplyDeleteAshton
Family is gonna be family, and no matter how much you bitch and moan, the fact remains. It's better than the alternative.
ReplyDeleteCynthia
I had this same discussion with my Father and his new wife. My mother passed away three years ago. If that wasn't hard enough, now I have some new whore trying to fill my mother's shoes trying to tell me how to feel and live. I told her where to go and how to get there. My father sided with her, so to hell with them both.
ReplyDeleteGlynnis
I always like it when you draw from your personal experiences. It brings the human element into it. Maybe I'm just nosey wanting to know more about you.
ReplyDeleteAllison
R.I.
I think you're being harsh. Yes family can push your buttons, but it's also family who will have your back no matter what. I think in the end it's a fair exchange. God speaks about family all the time. Hopefully you'll have a change of heart.
ReplyDeleteMaxwell
Nice blog. One thing for sure is that you can't stop them from being your family. No one said that ever day would be a good day. I do understand where you're coming from. Try having a family round table.
ReplyDeleteAnd here I thought I was the only one. Thanks for posting your thoughts. I look forward to your TGIF blasts. Thanks for taking the time to do so.
ReplyDeleteTamera
Hey guys. Thanks for your input. Weekly my fingers have a mind of their own, and I go with it.
ReplyDeleteMy views are my own, we dont always have to agree, but it's always really cool to share the exchange. Thanks
Kevin you hit the nail on the head. I have friends who are now my family, because they give me the respect that my family chooses not to give me.
ReplyDeleteCarmen
Alright there now, this one came in right on time. I just opened your email, and I really needed to read your words. My mother and I just had a heated arguement a g a i n. So I need to change some things up. Thanks again for your words.
ReplyDeleteAmanda
Hey man, you're not the only one who has struggles regarding family matters. Hang in there!
ReplyDeletebut when the shit hits the fan.. its family who has your back... hopefully
ReplyDelete