Spirits Having Flown/TGIF

Another Friday..

Last week a very close friend passed away in her sleep. In my group of friends, she was one of the oldest, she was like a sister/mother to us. Her passing came out of nowhere, and when I got the news I almost couldn't breathe. It likes a horrific dream, but you know its not. I'm left with years of memories, which is a blessing. We had the greatest times, I mean really great times.
I found myself sleeping a lot and not wanting to talk to anyone or deal with anything. I'm numb and so removed. Interestingly enough, I realize that the loss isn't as great as the gain, because your memories are yours for a lifetime, and I'm a much better person for having her in my life. I'm slowing participating in life again, as I should, and it's the thing she would want for me/us...to do LIVE!!

As we continue on with the focus on friendship, it's a constant reminder to give flowers while your loved ones are here on earth. Ame and I were great friends for over 18 years, and in those eighteen years, a lot of living, growing, developing,care and concentration was illustrated. We grew up together, we shared some highs and the occasional lows. To have a honest friendship is something that we all aspire to fulfill. Its never easy getting to that comfortable place. To be comfortable with someone takes time, and trust. We were that to each other, and effortlessly, we connected. I think we were two guarded kids, who grew up in the church with deep religious beliefs, expectations and questions.

These past ten days, I've felt her spirit with me, and it made me wonder where do we go to next. How one day you can be here, and the next day gone in a instant. How dreams, seem and can be so life like and very real. I allowed myself to be still, and really think about the times that we shared,and I've wondered what work is needed here, for me to see my friend again. I'm not unique, because at some point in our lives we will all lose someone close to us, the family members given the course of life, will pass. A lifetime friend is just as deep as losing a close family member, because often times, you're probably closer to them than family members.

In a dream, a story is told, sometimes the dream is so vivid, you don't want to wake to write it down, because you're certain that you'll remember it the next day. Unfortunately we aren't always lucky enough to recollect the dream, and that's unfortunate. Now when I have a great dream, I force myself to wake up, and I write it down. How many times have you felt some one's presence or heard a noise, when you've been home alone or driving in your car. Perhaps you smell a certain fragrance out of no where. Do you shrug the idea off, that it could possibly be a loved one, in the form of a spirit. I'll admit it's not a easy subject to wrap your mind around, but what if...

Sense memory is a acting exercise, take for instance your bedroom. Close your eyes, and can you visualize what's on your walls, the color of your bedspread, where did you leave the remote etc...try to recall what your last meaningful conversation was, and with whom? Now take it a step further, what was your last memory where you experienced a death, and how impacted was the loss?
When you look to the rainbow, do you find it to be happenstance, or do you feel there's a meaning to everything?
Life will severely test you, know that it's only preparation for something greater...

What are you doing with your life?



P.S. Pop Legend Whitney Houston returns to music with her first new release in seven years. 'I Look To You' hits records stores August 31-2009.